I live in a pretty small world but am like the benevolent dictator of this world. Everyone knows me. I wield tremendous power but the irony is, I really don’t do anything.

I evoke more emotions that the greatest film or play of all time. I not only tug at your heart strings, I crank on them like a tug of war game being played by the Marines. You love me. You hate me. You fear me. I am the most powerful magnet drawing you to me, even with the sometime heavy burden of these powerful emotions. You feel alive because of me.

I am the world’s greatest magician — Gandalf meets Harry Houdini. But unlike the fairy tales or the simple tricks of my rivals, I transform lives. People meet me and they radically change the way the live. The caterpiller becomes the butterfly. Their doubts burn away after meeting me. They dig into the darkest, deepest aspects of their psyche and pull up new and beautiful resources and characteristics, and wear them indefinitely. Because of me, you become better. You become the person the real You knew you always were.

I am the great motivator. Tony Robbins or Zig Ziglar are amateur hour compared to me. I make you get up at 4 or 5 am on a Saturday and knock down mile after mile. I am the only reason you suffer in the tremendous heat or drag your heels through the pouring rain. Yes, it is me. You know it and I know it and we have the perfect love/hate relationship because of it. I am make you do virtually anything.

I am the world’s great diet. You pass on the cake and eat the oatmeal because of yours truly. Beer? Chocolate? Pizza? Maybe once in a while but probably not. The American Heart Association should put me on their magazine cover. Forget the Zone or Atkins, I am the man of the hour. The man with the power.

Don’t get me wrong. I have a nasty side. I am the reason you suffer and suffer. I am the reason for the soreness and pull muscles and blisters. I help contort your body and make it go faster or farther that you thought possible. You despise me at times but in the end, I am the reason that you are stronger, leaner and healthier.

God loves me because I am one of the reasons you pray. When you are facing me, the prayers always seem to start with “Please God. . . “ When your back is to me, it is “Thank you God.” It does not matter what religion you follow or what beliefs you have, because of me, you get closer to HIM.

You love me. You hate me. You curse me. I make you cry. I make you hug people you don’t even know. . .and they love it. You fear me. You respect me. You call me many names.

I just call myself the FInish Line.

I was driving to my aikido class yesterday and had a couple of interesting experiences. There was a small gathering of about 7 or 8 people near Barnes & Noble, protesting the “predator practices of mortgage lenders.” The irony here was that at least 3 of them were wearing sneakers costing $130.

A couple of miles up the road, I pulled over to get gas and struck up a conversation with a gentleman next to me also filling up. He was angry about the gas prices and you could see his blood pressure rising, as evidenced by the fluorescent red color covering his face. He filled up and then pull away. . . in his Hummer H2.

I pulled out to the dojo and one of my fellow aikidoist was already training. It was around 92 degree and he was soaked from head to toe, struggling to get a specific jo (a traditional weapon that looks like a pool stick) form correct. He had been there for 90 minutes already and was in store for another 2 hours worth of training. The main reason he was struggling is that he is handicapped. Both his left hand and left foot are significantly impaired but I never once heard him complain. In fact, he has developed new techniques because of it. Our instructor expects as much from him as from everyone else. And he gets it, day in and day out.

The difference between these 3 or ANY situation always seems to come down to the same thing - When a person takes responsibility for their life, every single aspect of it and at all times, great things are always waiting there for them. Waiting for them to grab a hold, use them, enjoy the unlimited benefits and pass the powerful message along to the next willing student of life.

This is one of the impactful lessons sports like running can teach. You take responsibility for the details and based upon this decision, the results will follow. We are not children, dependent upon mommy for dinner or to wash clothes. You are in charge of You. Responsibility neutralizes everything. We train. We finish. We make excuses — it’s too hot or I had to go here today and could not fit it in — and 3 letters come to visit us at our next race. DNF.

What about the rain or the weather or the things you cannot control?

I spoke with our friend Jane who told us a story of her friend from England. She was running the NYC marathon and at mile 3, slipped and dislocated her kneecap. She hobbled a mile to the nearest med tent and had the patella popped back in place and tapped up, ready to go see a doctor. Well, that did not happen. She instead did something a little different — finished the race.

In 4 hours and 30 minutes.

Mother Theresa said it best –

Life is a promise; take the responsibility to fulfill it.

Toughness is a hard word to really define. There are so many variables that can be used to define a person as tough or not. My father was one of the toughest people I ever met. If he was alive today, it would take him about 3 minutes to pin a Grizzly bear. Why 3 minutes? Well, he would have been 82 so I will cut him some slack.

Lisa has a different kind of toughness. If we were to use the same parameter, it may not show up quite like my Dad. If she was in an ultimate fighting championship with say, a chipmunk, though I love her dearly, my money is on the fuzzy little rodent. However, there are many more important aspects to toughness. Ones that impact life to a significant degree. In these aspects, she is a master. Today at the Minnie Mouse weekend 15K, Lisa proved it yet again.

To complete the distance was not that difficult for Lisa. To do it as well as she would like . . .that is where one of the challenges would come into play. Also it would mark a return to a section where her Dad last saw her race. Internal struggles can be the toughest battles of all. Today would be a big one.

We arrived at around 5:30am in the Animal Kingdom parking lot where the Third Annual Minnie Mouse 15K would begin. 67 degrees with modest humidity was a warm welcome, so to speak. Lisa was unusually quiet on the ride here but you could almost hear her thinking. And wondering. And worrying. Probably a dozen other things as well.

As a spectator, it is an interesting vantage point to see the reactions of the 3000 runners. A mixture of nerves and excitement filled the air like raindrops during a thunderstorm. Last minute checks included filling up water bottles, checking the ChampionChip and making sure the Cliff Shots were secure. Then the moment of truth. Fireworks accompanied the countdown and the race is off. I caught a glimpse of Lisa about 100 yards from the start, looking all chipper and happy. It would be a “long short”day; that is, a medium distance of 9.3 miles but a lot of personal obstacles along the way.

For me, it was jump in the car and drive off to Epcot to wait. And wait and wait. Unfortunately, there are no viewing areas along the route other than start and finish. I stood just outside the entrance of Epcot in the shadow of Spaceship Earth or as the locals call it, The Ball with a 3 month old Chocolate Laborador using my Asics as a chew toy.

Disney truly is a magnificent place. Yes, one can find a thousand and one things wrong with it — it is expensive, the lines are long, they could be better at XYZ etc., but at the end of the day, it is the most inspiring, lively, upbeat place around. We both love it and are extremely grateful that we have access to it 365 days a year. I could not even begin to count the number of memorable experiences we have had here over the years. Walt was truly a special soul.

I also thought about Lisa’s Dad. He too was a huge Disney fan and undoubtedly would have been beyond proud to have seen his daughter doing this race. Ironically, one of the most enjoyable memories was of Lisa’s parents at mile 21, playing part crew and part saints by brining us supplies at our first marathon together. This experience was one of the sources of inspiration for him to run. Had his final chapter in life taken a different turn, we most likely would have been returning the favor at the Disney Half marathon by crewing him. After that experience, he may juuuuuust have then taken the plunge and gone for the full. These are the beautiful memories the Disney races inspire, even if they are fantasy.

Lisa set a 1 hour, 50 minute time goal and this would be challenging. But toughness is something she has embraced, chipmunk fighting notwithstanding. If I thought of her Dad, I was sure her thoughts would be even more powerful, more emotional. 1:50 would be maybe too. . . before I could finish the sentence, a soaked but smiling Hobbit sized runner with big green eyes came bounding up the hill. She had the look of a strong determined runner, one who covered a lot more than just 9.3 miles. The finish line was still 50 yards away but that distance was covered in a hurry.

The clock read 1:45.

PR achieved. Mission accomplished!

I never saw toughness look so good.

Virtually everything has very identifiable and recognizable phases. Four seasons. Planting a tree. Aging. The list is endless. Running also has phases as well.

1. The Gathering Phase. Here we comb through the magazines, websites and flyers looking for the next great event. We gather the information, narrow it down to a few and talk it out with our friends. “Did you do this race? Know anyone who has?” We are like squirrels gathering nuts or more precisely nuts gathering event information.

2. The Identification Phase. From the many comes the one. The next big one. We have our event and of course, mark it on the calendar. Highlighted in retina blinding yellow no less. We know how many weeks and days until The Day.

3. The Planning Phase. OK, we have the calendar and now count backwards, figuring out our training schedule. If I start Monday, I have X number of weeks. Like a general, we have the details and strategy plotted, memorized and ready to go.

4. The Training Phase. This is the tough one. The one no one sees but the one that makes or breaks a person. Up at 5am and on the road at 6. Why? That is when the race starts so it is time to condition the body and even more so, the mind. Yogi Berra said it best — Half the game is 50% mental. A lot of endurance training is mental. Long runs can be both lonely and mind-numbing. You want to quit 1000s of times yet the internal fire pushes you forward. It is the difference between those who “will do it some day” and you who will do it on Sept 22nd or January 8th or The Day.

5. The Acting Phase. This begins about a week before the event. We tell ourselves that this event is no big deal. If we finish and do well, that is great. If not, life goes on. And for a good 5 days, we actually pretend to believe this. “Yes, I poured my heart and soul and every ounce of my being into training for this for 5 months but it is really just a simple event.” Yea. Right. . . .and the Oscar goes to . . . . . .

6. The Hyper Phase. This begins 24-48 hours before the event. We return the Oscar and pick up the Reality Award. Our “acceptance speech” sounds like this — “Oh I am not sure that I am ready for this even though I know I trained very long and very hard or did I train as hard as I think I did and come to think about it I am really not sure if I did or not and do I have enough Cliff Shots and make sure to be hydrated and what if I get a blister that slows me down. . . (slight pause here to catch breath).” English teachers specializing in run on sentences would need prozac after listening to a 3 minute conversation.

7. The Event Phase. “It is here at last. Here at last. Thank you God it is here at last!” This is the phase usually utter by the significant other who is not running the event and may need to borrow the aforementioned prozac if this lasted another day.

For the runner however, it is The Day. The event is the climax. The climb to the top of the mountain. The Super Bowl meets Game #7 of the World Series. For some, it is a job. A payday. For others, it is a journey that produces unexpected results and remarkable experiences that will last a lifetime. The Runner becomes the Changling. The one who starts the event is never the one who finishes it. Some where along the course, the miles, the people and the whole experience changes all who are open to it. The inner world opens and the poet finds his Muse. Inspiration, Determination, Courage and others come for a visit. Sometimes, they stay for the rest of your life.

8. The Post Race Phase A. This occurs immediately after an event. If it is a long one like a marathon, there is a mixture of relief and exhilaration and probably 40 other experiences. Here the body is temporarily in charge. It needs rest and food. Not much matters other than those.

9. The Post Race Phase B. A day or 2 later, one feels recovered. Soreness or blisters are “worn” proudly like a new graduate holding her diploma. The pain is a passing memory and now, the remarkable experiences pounce to the forefront. Here the athlete wants to share his or her experiences, particularly with those they know can relate and appreciate their accomplishment. Yes, this was just and event but when the “Big Show” is finished, these are the moments that will be remembered. These are the moments that take an ordinary life and make it on filled with energy and excitement. They let you know that you are ALIVE.

10. The Next Phase. The muscles are recovered. The blisters are healed and the pain is long forgotten. You know whats coming next. Get the magazines, the flyers and the web sites baby! Strap on the seatbelt. HERE WE GO AGAIN!

Have you ever looked at something 100, 200 or 1000 times and then one day, you finally see it for the magnificence that it truly is?

Today was hill repeats in a sleepy little place near us called Oakland (population = 24K). It is a beautiful town near Lake Apopka, surrounded by more wildlife than you can imagine. And of course, steep hills. I have been training here 1x/wk., for the past couple of months and somewhere between #8 and #9 repeats, it was as if opaque cellophane was lifted from the surface and Nature revealed Herself like never before. When fatigue grabs a strong hold and you commit to pushing through, monkey mind shuts off and Truth and Insight comes to the forefront.

The revelation that came forth was that all around me is a school. In fact, the perfect school. Right here, right now. Virtually everything and everyone around me is teaching, presenting a lesson of one sort or another. Best of all, there are no pop quizzes or dissertations to complete.

The 4 or 5 alligators floating around the dock were the perfect teachers for patience. Be still. Be calm. Ask and you will receive. In this case, it was a good sized breakfast of fish. From the fish’s perspective, the lesson was drift, don’t be present and you may not like the results. Opposite ends of the spectrum and opposite results, yet total balance. Another previously hidden lesson.

Squirrels also played the role of professor. As I was going up the hill, a couple of them decided to race me. Aside from demonstrating superior speed, they also taught that pleasure, enjoyment and plain old fun is as much a part of life as everything else. If circumstances are not allowing fun to enter your life, take the Napolean approach. Napolean is quoted as saying, “Circumstances? I create circumstances!”

Hill repeat #10 brought the awareness of a blue jay playing mom in the tree near a stop sign. Her instincts are remarkable. Push the babies out too soon and you have a disaster. Leave them in the nest too long and you cripple them for life.

A foot long snake was playing ninja near the fence. Always in the shadow, always in the darkness, the snake lives in fear. Fear that the birds of prey will have him for dinner. Fear that the occasional car will transform him into a pancake. Most people who see the snake experience fear. It is a perfect example of the law of attraction — feel fear continually and that is what you attract continually. It is not surprising that the snake seems to live a lonely life.

Even the trees and plants got into the act. They seem to be aware of the abundance all around them Never at a loss for sun or nutrients, they continue to grow in all directions throughout their entire lives. What a great guideline for those of us without leaves or branches.

I went out today for hill training and ended up back in school. Now, the homework is applying the lessons to life.  This is the real uphill run.

One of my favorite things about running is setting up dates for the events. Live in the moment but train for the next event. Always found that motivating. Now. . . drum roll please. . . for this year’s events, we have the following:

• October = Tower of Terror 13K. Loved this race last year. Starts at 10pm and goes through Wide World of Sports and finishes up in MGM. Park remains open afterwards which was half the fun.
  
• November = Celebration 10K or Sea World 10K; Space Coast Half Marathon. Celebration was fantastic last year but I am always looking for newness so Sea World may fill the bill. Space Coast was also exceptional and this year, I am doing it for time.
  
• December = Gulf Coast Halfathon (Half Marathon). New run. Course looks flat and beautiful, overlooking the Gulf. Near Sarasota.
  
• January = Disney Full Marathon. 5th year in a row but this one is the first time I am doing it for time.
  
• February = Gasparilla Michelob Ultra Challenge — 5K followed by a 15K on Saturday; Full Marathon on Sunday. This Sat/Sun duo could be a bear of a run. It will be my first back-to-back and also first time I will run 2 marathons in a year. . . actually it will be 2 in a month.
  
• June 9 = St. Augustine’s True Grit Ultra Marathon 50K. This is the big boy. First ultra. If I like it, then I will give 40 miles a shot. If that works out well, it will be the the Florida Keys 50 Mile Ultra in 2010.
  

I am thrilled with this schedule. It is a blending of favorites and new ones, with a couple of big adventures at the end. This year for the first time, I want to achieve specific time goals for a 10K, Half and Full marathon. See what that side of the coin looks like.

It took less than 1/10 of a second to answer. A resounding “No” came forth, more by reflex than by refection, thought or any cognitive processing whatsoever. That was the lightning quick reply to the question posed to her, “Would you ever do a marathon?” The second part of the conversation was equally enlightening. When asked why, there was a shrug, some stammering and a defensive ‘Well I just can’t” as if I was asking her to provide her weight or other personal data. That was how my run began today. Throughout the 7 mile recovery run, the way in which the question was answered and the non-verbals hovered around my psyche. It reminded me of one of those times when you are not sure if you turned the stove off or not. It sort of just sticks with you until the matter is resolved.

As I methodically covered the miles, I thought about the questions and answers. Yes, a marathon is a long distance and not everyone is cut out for such an event. Also, not everyone enjoys the struggle or the challenge. But something about the answer was gnawing at me. Somewhere between seeing the rabbit enjoy a late breakfast on the Trail and the Rottweiler who seemed way too interested in my water bottle (or was it my neck?), the answer sprang forth. This was not an answer; rather it was a knee jerk reaction. It was a classic example of how to live Life by Default.

Go to write anything in MS Word and it always defaults to Times New Roman font. In many ways for seemingly infinite numbers of reasons, we live life in this fashion. For many people. . . perhaps all of us at least some of the time. . . our default is set to NO. Can you start a new business? Will you join me in a scuba trip? How about doing an Ultra? No. No. Most certainly NO! Kahil Gibran said it best. We choose our joys and sorrows long before we experience them.

If truth be told and the real answer was in fact “NO” all would be fine. The problem is that the question is never really answered truthfully. It is answered by default. Truth and Genuine Desire are not allowed in the debate. Default takes over at the first sign of fear or newness or out-of-the-ordinary. Adventure and change are seen as horrible words and thus to be avoided at all costs. Choice never even had a chance. Default the Dictator is now in charge.

Running has opened up my world, both inner and outer versions. In fact, it has changed my fault dramatically. Interacting with both elite athletes as well as elite-at-heart athletes, supporters, family members and friends and everyone in between has demonstrated how powerful choice truly is. Run or not run. Quit or finish. Complain or Appreciate the opportunities. Their defaults are set on choices - “Evaluate. Imagine. Explore. Go for it!”

Change is hard for most people. Newness can be intimidating or downright scary. You think a marathon is scary? Maybe. Starting a new business or relationship is hard? Yes. What’s worse than all is exclusively living Life by Default.

A while back, I did a week long aikido training in Colorado. It was a fantastic event featuring the top aikido masters from around the globe. 6-7 hours a day was spent in the 7000 ft. altitude, learning from the best of the best.

Upon return, 2 of us were asked to relay or demonstrate what we learned or at least what we could remember from the 100s of techniques demonstrated. My friend Duff went first, covering a variety of throws, arm bars and wrist locks. It was an impressive display of both technique and memory. Yours truly was next and my approach was a little different. I did not demonstrate technique but rather relayed a message.

There was one instructor in particular who had a significant impact on me. His name is Frank Duran Sensei, a high ranking, highly respected teacher from California. After serving his country with honor, Duran Sensei went on to study martial arts and aikido in particular for several decades. As you would imagine, his skill level is off the charts. His approach is much different than one might imagine.

At the start of any class, it is typical for the instructor to say nothing and just go right into demonstration of a technique. Occasionally, some will lecture about the history of said technique. Then it is roll up the sleeves and bang away. Not this time. Duran sensei said 2 words — “Practice kindness.”

Two simple words but with heart and power to them. Sometimes, we think of characteristics such as kindness as something we are born with like blue eyes or long arms. With those 2 simple words, Duran sensei reminded us that kindness is an act that can be developed with repetition, with practice, the way one learns a language or a musical instrument. It is something that is more limitless than the Pacific ocean or all oceans combined. It can be practice anywhere with anyone at anytime. No special equipment is needed. Just desire.

Endurance athletes are masters at planning. Often, it is the subject of many conversations. “What are you doing this weekend?”

How many lives would change if the answer to this question was “I am doing a ten mile run. . . and practicing kindness.”

I consciously became aware of Opposite Man around 15 years ago where he showed up at my clinic in South Florida. He takes many forms and this time, he took the form of Financial Opposite Man. He bought anything and everything, regardless of price and regardless of whether he could afford it or not. Debt piled but Opposite Man ignored it. At the end of the year, Opposite Man went bankrupt. . . for the third time -this despite a Harvard education. I learned as much from Financial Opposite Man as I did from some of the most successful people in America. I learned exactly what not to do.

After that, I met Opposite Man in Naples when Lisa and I were about to start our business. He looked much different than his prior appearance.  This time Opposite Man morphed into Cannot Man. “You can’t do that because________.” “And you cannot do this because______.” Regardless of circumstances Cannot Man only had one reply — You can’t! Fortunately, Lisa in particular was stronger than Opposite Man and showed him that fears are not real and if they are, so what. Do it anyway! I learned a lot from Opposite Man in this situation. Only you hold you back and only you can move you forward. Choice is yours.

Opposite Man came to life in Orlando as well. Though I only saw him on occasion, each time was a new chapter. This time, he had more “personalities” than Sybil. I watched how saying what to do versus actually doing it impacts your life. How living life to the fullest is so much more rewarding than hiding from it. How excuses, regardless of their emotional impact, are just that - excuses. How phrases such as “I co-create my life” or “With God, all is possible” are so much more empowering than “That’s the way it is. What can you do about it.” and other victim-mentality mantras. Opposite Man clearly showed how living now works much more than living for retirement. He was also a poet. Robert Frost’s famous “Take the road less traveled” took on a new twist. It was more like the slightly less famous Bobby Dew famous line of “Take the road most traveled, regardless of the pot hots and tolls along the way. It just seems safer.” This time, Opposite Man was more than a teacher. He was Dean of the entire Opposite College.

There have been countless other examples of Opposite Man and I am grateful for every one of them. Opposite Man has been a wonderful teacher in my life. These people can be strangers, friends, relatives or acquaintances. They are young or old and everywhere in between. Sometimes they can even be seen in the mirror.  I may not know what TO do but always have examples of what NOT to do.

If you have an Opposite Man in your life, embrace them, observe them and give thanks for their example. If you are Opposite Man, consider changing. How?

Do the opposite.

This past Saturday was the Windermere Race Around the Lakes 5K. The event was attended by some 1100 hundred people who experienced a beautiful warm day, the kind that makes you appreciate being in Florida even more than usual.

The route was probably the most scenic 5K around, swirling through the 3 lakes of Windermere, the back roads and dirt, gravel, grass and blacktop surfaces. People of all ages ran, jogged and walked the course with the winner coming in at a quick 17:04, despite the winding roads and unstable surfaces.

I finally completed a sub-30 minute finish but quite frankly, can’t say I enjoyed myself. 5K just don’t cut it.

There was a 16th century philosopher (whose name I cannot recall) who stated that all behavior is either moving toward pleasure or avoiding pain. For me, 5K’s are a lot of pain and virtually no pleasure, regardless of meeting a time goal or not. You are always in the red zone during the run and when the event is over, it feels as if not much was experienced or accomplished.

I did have some favorable moments and things learned however. The route was absolutely beautiful and a couple of shelties around mile 1.5 added to the visual treat. I also learned to respect even more, people like Jane and Bob and others who do triathlons. When you train for a single purpose — in my case, long distance — it is very difficult to switch gears and do something different. In this case, it was a short, fast run. To do 3 different things, all in one day no less, is very impressive.

Mostly, I appreciated the value of friendship and the enormous impact being around upbeat, high energy people can have on anyone. Lisa, Kay, Victoria and Roxanne have formed a really supportive friendship and  are quite interesting to be around and watch. They are as opposite as can be and turn the world of mathematics on its head. In this case, 1 + 1 + 1 + 1 equal about 50 (at least this week. Numbers continually increase.) Regardless of skill level or experience, they support each other and the individual goals without hesitation. They also push each other and bring out their very best. They are ones to participate in life to the fullest as oppose to hide from it. Others may say “that is not possible” while they are out on the Trail doing it. Be around them for 2 minutes and your energy is already happier and healthier. It is very impressive to see this.

Ralph Waldo Emerson once stated that weak men attribute success to luck. Strong men attribute it to cause and effect. Watching this foursome, this quote most certainly applies to women as well.

At least this group!